Thursday, December 18, 2008

Suitor Number Fifteen



Hello ladies. Meet Symo. With such a vast array of subjects on his blog (including sports), Symo can whisper sweetly in your ear about almost anything. He’s the fresh meat in the blogosphere so be sure to check him out nice and hard. 

Have you ever dated or been associated with Elisha Cuthbert, Alyssa Milano or Hillary Duff? If yes, have you been recently tested for a venereal disease?
 
Oh good Lord no... they won't return my calls.


True or false: My ass is bigger than Sidney Crosby's. 
 
False. That's just not feasible.


Rate your flexiblity on a scale of 1-10. 1 is Kyle Wellwood and 10 is Roberto Luongo.
 
4.  Some parts are stiffer than others!


Your stick is: wood or composite
Wood.  Pure, hard, natural wood (baby).

Sarah Palin is......
a. destroying hockey
b. using it for political gain
c. I'd tap that 

(note: C will result in application denial)
d. She's breathing, so technically I'd have to vote c, but I'd shoot myself afterward.


Don Cherry is....
a. full of shit
b. composed entirely of shit
 
b.  I spoke with his doctor.


You like to go: top shelf or five hole
 
Sometimes it won't fit in the 5 hole, so THEN I go top shelf.


High heels at games; yes or no
 
Oh hell yes.  Flats and sandals are for women who don't want to get laid (by men at least).  

Role playing potential: can your acting skills rival the likes of Derek Roy? 
 
Who do I look like, Michael Caine?  

My dad is Michael Therrien. He says he wants to meet your soft ass. How much do you love me? 
 
I'm scared of NO man that speaks French.


Your girlfriend wants a custom jersey for their birthday. But you utterly hate and despise the team and the player that they want. Do you still buy them the jersey?
 
Absoultely.  See the next answer....


Your girlfriend/boyfriend asks you if "you wanna go? you wanna go" in a thick canadian accent. Explain your following actions in detail. Slower....yeah. Just like that. 
 
Nothings hotter than pulling that jersey over her head and _____ (<--- fill in, must start with f) the hell out of her.


The Slapshot question: On a date, would you bring your fucken toys with ya?
 
If it's Alyssa, then yes.
 
A girl is wearing a pink hockey jersey. but you find out she know about everything about hockey. she is smart, witty, can rattle off stanley cup teams from years ago. does the pink jersey make her less attractive?
 
No.  Pink jerseys look about the same crumpled up in the corner as a regular jersey.  Makes it easier to find in the morning too.
You're at a hockey game and your team is loosing and you look pissed. An ice girl approaches you and asks to cheer you up. Do you accept a blow job or a hand job?
 
Blow me.  You ever see a woman drive a stick shift?  Not many of them are good at THAT (but when they are... ).
 

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